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DYING TO BE FREE

I'm taking a blog or two off from politics and terrorism. I know I didn't post anything about the 7th anniversary of 9-11. To tell the truth, it still hurts to think of that day. And it hurts to watch both of these clowns running for President toss verbal jabs back and forth about things that don't matter a hill of beans. Childish. On both their parts.

What I'd like them to do, whichever one wins, is do something about the ongoing genocide that is still being perpetrated on wild animals in this world. Things such as ivory trade and canned hunting.

Canned hunting. Let's look at that little atrocity. Even my heroes Vice President Dick Cheney and former Dallas Cowboy star Roger Staubach are guilty of that. 

Canned hunts are private trophy hunting ranches, also referred to as "shooting preserves" or "game ranches." Canned hunts offer their customers an opportunity to kill confined exotic and/or native species for a price. Though not all canned hunt facilities are the same, here are a few things they all have in common:

• Animals cannot escape. Canned hunts may range from a few to thousands of acres, but there is always a fence. On large ranches, guides drive hunters out to feed plots or bait stations that the animals are known to visit at certain times of the day. Small ranches offer animals in fenced areas where the hunter may approach the animals on foot, pick his target up close, take aim, and shoot.

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• Canned hunting often means a slow death. Because the object of the hunt is a trophy, hunters generally aim at an animal's non-vital organs in order to leave the head and chest unscathed. This makes for a more attractive trophy but condemns the animal to a slow and painful death.

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• The animals are often semi-tame. Because the animals are often bred on site or purchased from game farms, animal dealers—perhaps even zoos—they have been habituated to humans. Animals who've lost their fear of humans are easy targets, which makes it easy for canned hunt operators to offer a "no kill—no pay" guarantee.

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• Exotic and native animals are bred for canned hunts. The exotic species bred to be killed in canned hunts include many varieties of goats and sheep, several species of deer and antelope, Russian boar, and zebra. The native species include deer, elk, bison, and bear.

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• Hunting groups that subscribe to the concept of "fair chase" oppose canned hunts. Boone & Crockett, Pope & Young, the Orion Institute, and the Izaak Walton League all denounce canned hunting. Many individual hunters also scorn canned hunting as unsportsmanlike.

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• Canned hunts carry the risk of spreading disease. Canned hunts can be directly related to the spread of serious wildlife diseases, most notably chronic wasting disease. When animals are concentrated in numbers, share food plots, or congregate at bait stands, the likelihood of disease transmission increases. Disease transmission is not only a risk to captive animals but also a potential threat to free-roaming wildlife. Many states have banned canned hunts because of the seriousness of this threat.

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• Canned hunts are legal in most of the United States. Most states allow canned hunting. At this time, no federal law governs canned hunting. The Animal Welfare Act does not regulate game preserves, hunting preserves, or canned hunts. Although the Endangered Species Act protects species of animals listed as endangered or threatened, it does not prohibit private ownership of endangered animals and may even allow the hunting of endangered species.

Now, if you want to hunt that's your right but let's keep it interesting. And humane. If you want to continue to hunt tame and fenced in animals then call me. I'll set it up for you myself. You can come here to Arkansas and I'll let you hunt me. Of course, I'll have a gun too, just to make it "interesting." And I'm tame, just ask my wife. Of course, her favorite poem is by an unknown author:

"Two in the chest, one in the head. I'm alive and you're dead."

Come on down. Let's play.

How's that for hugging the Bible and our guns down south, Bin Obama? (You didn't really think I'd miss a chance to poke fun at Barack once, did you?)

	“I don’t have to show my patriotism to be patriotic. A pin on my lapel is not important.”
	Really? It's important to patriots, Papa Bin Osama.
	"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."
	Really? Better check those "facts", Papa Al.
	"Having children is selfish. It's all about maintaining your genetic line at the expense of the planet."
	Really? Is that baby blood on your hands, Non-Mom?
	"In Iran we don't have homosexuals like in your country..."
	Really? Who's your "friend", Papa Immadforjihad?
	"You have to stop. You can ask a question but you can't just blather on your opinion."
	Really? Is that your mouth still running, Mom Lezbo?
	"The American people are tired of liars and people who pretend to be something they're not."
	Really? Aren't YOU pretending, Mom Lefto?
	"The biggest terrorist is George W. Bush."
	Really? Better look in the mirror, Mom Wacko.